Henry David Thoreau

Reflecting on my session with my therapist and the emotions that came with a follow-up email from him, this mornings meditation brought the memory of when I first heard the words of Thoreau. I was a junior in high school. I'm not sure if my grandmother had died yet or not but it was the first time I heard the truth about how I was feeling. It was the first time I read it in black and white. The thoughts that were crawling through my teenage brain suddenly were affirmed. What if the hokey pokey is all it is about?

"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation."

~Walden (1854), Henry David Thoreau

The comments post email communications between my therapist and myself over the course of some pretty emotional days for me.

Update

Bill called. He was glad I had called and had noticed my racing thoughts from our earlier session this week. He and I have an appointment for Tuesday. In the mean time he reiterated what I have already said. But hearing his words the connection with another person other than my partner is comforting. Sangha. He told me to breath into the earth. Know this is real but not to buy into it.

Hooked

I am spinning and have called Bill. I need help in grounding but feel okay to practice myself. I am hearing Pema's words of refraining. I am not stopping the rush of feelings but trying to let them pass on by like a ticker tape. She talked about Dzigar Kongtrül teachings on shenpa. Recognizing when we are hooked. I find therapy helps me with the content of my thoughts and buddhism works at cutting the root. This is a root issue for me. Psychic stuff. I am working to find ground in the groundless...if that makes sense.